Thursday, July 5, 2012

Getting By With a Little (Or a Lot of ) Help from My Friends

First, let me thank everyone who stuck with me while I was in the process of having a meltdown earlier this week.  Sorry about that.

Second, let me say this – it never fails to amaze me how people will reach a hand out to you if you are only brave and honest enough to admit that you need help.

It shouldn’t be so hard to admit when you’re struggling. I don’t know who decided that the noble thing to do is to suffer in silence, but I think we should find that person and write him or her a strongly worded letter, because this notion is highly mistaken. It’s not noble to suffer. And the people who love you? Will never thank you for keeping them out of your life, for shutting them out of your hurting, for not allowing them to support you in the way that they want you to do BECAUSE they love you.

That’s how love works.

Why this should be so freaking complicated, I have NO idea.

But it is.

Or it is for me, anyway.

It’s been a rough couple of weeks here. So finally, last week, I started reaching out – not because I wanted to, with my ridiculous inability not to be stubborn – but because I was starting to be afraid of what would happen if I didn’t.

My friends – bless them – reached back.

In small ways. In great big honking ones.  In “let’s sit down and talk” ways, in emails (LOTS of them), by riding to the rescue “let me help you to restructure your health insurance” ways, in “I’m coming over tomorrow” ways,  in “I know someone who can help you with this” ways, in “You don’t have to carry this all by yourself” ways.

I don’t think that there are enough words to say thank you to every single person who helped hold me up over the last week, but I hope that everyone – every single person – knows that, thanks to you, my heart is so very full, and that all of the things that were weighing me down? The ones I’m still carrying are lighter and manageable.

In the words of Abby Sciuto, “I am hugging you all. In my mind.” And if I can manage it, it will be in person as well.  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Y’all are the BEST.

Hugs – great big ones –

Danielle

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