Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Real Talk

Let's talk about being a woman in a male-dominated workplace.

Let's talk about the fact that you have to be brilliant. You have to be better than the best. You have to be flawless and make it look effortless.

You are hesitant to ask questions because you never want to be perceived as "less than". You smile big. You look pretty. You go the extra mile in a way that a man wouldn't -- you fetch coffee. You clean up. 

When you are referred to as a girl, even though you are in your forties, you don't say anything. It's a compliment, right?

(It's not a compliment.)

You order lunch. You are the only person who ever gets asked to order lunch, but that's okay. You apparently understand food better than your male coworkers. How it works. Where to get it.

Your statements get questioned, as though the facts that you present in meetings are tainted by the presence of an additional X chromosome, but "your hair looks great today."

"Are you SURE this is correct?"

"Are you SURE this is correct?"

"This can't be correct. I will ask a man. Man, is this correct?"

"Oh, it is? Huh. Thank you Man, for your help."

But your hair looks nice, so that's something.

I guess.

You feel like you can't complain. You feel like saying something makes you a whiner. You feel like you need to be tougher.

You sometimes cry in the bathroom because you don't want anyone to see and chalk it up to you being on your period. "You know how girls are."

You know how "girls" are?

The "girls" are pissed. 

At least this one is. 

And there will be no more. No more apologies for having opinions. No more "I'm sorry" for having ideas. 

And no more -- NO. MORE. -- tolerance of grossly sexist and horrible behavior.

That's real talk.