Friday Randoms

I

"Isn't the rat sometimes supposed to get the cheese?"

"All I can think now that you've said that is MMMMMMMMMMMM CHEESE OMNOMNOM."

"..."

"I mean, yes, sometimes the rat is supposed to get the cheese."

II

"Those shoes are super cute."

"Yes, they're sassy little instruments of torture."

III

"... so then I was all, 'Don't make me throw this at you' and he was like, 'Whatever' and I thought, who does that?"

"I can tell you're not from New England."

"What?"

"In New England, we chuck things at people. And then they huck them back at us."

"You guys are weird."

"Don't make me chuck this at you."

IV

"She's crazy. Like, CRAZY. Like when everyone was in line for some crazy dust, she got a big assed helping of it."

V

"I am tired of being abused by my job. I mean, don't get me wrong. I like some abuse. Like, tie me up but don't, you know, burn me."

"I feel like that may have been too much information."

"Sorry, my filter's down."