Wednesday, December 7, 2011


It’s so easy unintentionally to hurt someone. Not because their feelings don’t matter to you, because they do, but because sometimes, your truth is not what they want or need to hear. It’s like we’re all wearing glasses that allow what we need to be in sharp focus, but what other people want or need is a little less clear, so while you reach for that thing – whatever it might be – you can’t necessarily see what it is you’re bumping up against, or who you might be knocking down.

Or, in other words: It’s hard when someone’s dreams and your dreams don’t exactly match up.

It’s harder still when you don’t even have to time to have a dream. Because honestly, if you asked me right now what I dream of? I would tell you that right now, I’m the one-day-at-a-time girl. If I am getting crazy, I might look ahead to the weekend. That’s how my life works right now and I’m finding peace with it, because I know it’s just right now. It’s not forever. It’s just for the next several todays, until I get to the other side of the mountain I’m climbing.

I don’t mind the climb. I do mind that other people mind it, because … I wanted to say there’s nothing I can do, but that’s not true. I could tell myself that it’s just a job, it’s not that important. I could back down or give up but I’m not going to because I don’t quit. I’ve seen other people – people I trusted, people I thought highly of – walk away.

This girl doesn’t walk away from a fight.

There are people counting on me. I’m not going to let them down. That’s the bottom line.

But by having such a narrow focus, I know that I have hurt someone, and I don’t know how to reconcile that.

1 comment:

  1. Surely everyone has been in your shoes at least once,,,some of us more then once( like yours truly!) So what do y ou do about it? Shrug it off like it never happened? Side step it as too say I hope you didn't take it the way I said it? Or should you take that person aside and apollogize? I personally believe that honesty is the best route! Without honesty who are we really? A trash talking nothing! I remember when a spit and a hand shake was all you needed to make a deal and that was as good as any hand written contract....Lord I miss them days!
    So anyways my suggestion to you is if your truly bothered by what was said and how it happened, try explaining why you did what you did and why you said what you said to this person! One of two things will happen, they'll either except it or they won' either case you made an attempt and you shouldn't give it another thought.................(A)..............