Better

I realized I was doing better when I started giggling at work. 

When I started looking forward to things. "Oh! That thing I want to go to is this weekend! I can't wait for the thing!"

When my sense of humor comes back in full effect. "I just heard a commercial that sounded like they said, Choose our company. Choose goats. And I don't think that can be right because they're an Internet provider? But I love goats. They're so cute and bouncy! I just... You don't usually get bonus goats with the Internet. Like, Here's your router. AND A GOAT. I mean, where would we even put a goat." (I still don't know what they said. But I really want it to be goats.)

When I remembered that it's okay to be a bit broken. Or a lot broken. And I remembered that I don't ever stay broken. I have tape and glue and stuff and I know how to use them.

When I remembered that if I need help, I just need to say help and a hell of a lot of you come running.

When I remembered that I also know how to help other people.

That's when I realized I was better. I know I will be better still. I also know? I'll be worse again, sometimes, because that's how this works.

But I'm better now. And now's where I live.