Monday, May 23, 2016

Live Long and Prosper (In Whatever Bathroom Works for You)

It occurs to me that I might be a Vulcan.


I do have slightly pointed ears, and I can do that thing with my hands, and also?

I become IRATE when people create arguments that are not based on logic or reason.

Like, trans people can't use the bathroom of the gender that they identify with because pedophiles and sex offenders. Here's my problem with that argument:

Trans people? Are not the same as pedophiles and sex offenders. They don't belong in the same category. Let's not make trans people criminals because their biological gender doesn't match their psychological gender (and I think I might have used those terms wrong -- if so I am sorry, trans people). Feeling trapped in the wrong kind of body is not a crime.

Should pedophiles and sex offenders be kept out of the bathroom of their preferred victimology? Probably, but laws restricting public bathroom use to people of a specific biological gender won't actually prevent that because -- and I can't believe that I am having to point this out -- some individuals prey on people of their same gender. Ergo, if a man is intent on molesting a little boy? This law does not help. Not even a little.

Someone said to me, well, but you don't want a man in the ladies room.

But you WILL have men in the women's room, y'all. You'll have biological women who identify as men and, as far as I'm concerned, that MAKES them men. You're going to have men in there, ladies. Bearded, buff, clearly male men.

And the men's room? Will have ladies in it. Ladies who look like ladies. Ladies in dresses and makeup. Ladies in shorts and skirts. LADIES.

If we're going to talk about safety, let's talk about the fact that by forcing trans people to use the bathroom of their biology and not their identity, you are painting a big old target on their foreheads simply because they have to pee.  Transgendered women are ALREADY 1.8 times more likely to experience sexual violence than the rest of the population*, and that's without having to go into a bathroom that forces them to out themselves. In 2013, 72% of hate violence homicide victims were transgendered women and a large percentage of those were transgendered women of color.

Let's also talk about the women who have been assaulted because they are actually trying to use the bathroom that matches their biological and psychological gender because -- wait for it -- they don't look FEMALE enough. Like Aimee Toms, who had the audacity to have short hair and a ball cap in the bathroom. Yep, she's a lady. Yep, she has lady parts. Yep, another woman flipped out at her because she decided that she didn't look like she belonged.

How's that going to work out for the people who have those same lady parts but are fully bearded because they identify as men?

Logic says it's going to be horrible.

You guys. Life is hard. It's hard for everyone.

Let's make it LESS hard. Let's take one thing off of our plate of things to worry about. When you go into the bathroom, worry about doing your business. Worry about germs. Worry about how much you hate the hand drier.

Don't worry about what kind of genitalia the person in the neighboring stall has. That's -- creepy. And weird. And not cool.

Be cool.

Maybe then we could all live long and prosperous lives.

In the meantime, if you live somewhere that has this kind of bullshit law, you can help by being a buddy as part of #illgowithyou. Check them out here. Let's all keep each other safe, okay?


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