Friday, March 15, 2013

Friday Randoms


"So what did you do today?"

"Drank 3 bottles of ginger ale. Thought about getting dressed. Didn't. Took a nap. Thought about showering. Didn't. Went to the grocery store in my jammies."


"Saw the cute guy while I was there. He gave me the reverse 'How YOU doin'?' nod? Like a reflex? And then looked horrified when he really got a look at me. How was I doing? I had jammies, crazy hair, and a cart full of kleenex and ginger ale."


"Who doesn't want to get with the girl in sock monkey pants? I mean, what's hotter than THAT?"


"I want to sing the 'I'm a GENIUS' song."

"You have a song for that."

"Yep. It goes: 'Whoooooo's a geeeenius? WAIT! That's ME!' and then there are jazz hands."

"It's the jazz hands that make it."

"They make EVERYTHING better. 'Cause they're JAZZY."


"How much coffee have you had today?"

"I dunno. Four cups? Five? Why do you ask?"

"Your HAIR is vibrating."


"About what?"

"Um. Life?"


"Oooh, look at this eye shadow! I love this stuff. It's the BEST. I used to buy this all of the time. But in, you know, whacked out colours like ... gold. Pink. Red."

"That's ... so surprising."


"You? being or doing something whacked out? I can't even IMAGINE."

"I know, right? ... Wait a minute. My sarcasm dinger just dinged."


"All of your clothes are black."

"I know. EVERYTHING MATCHES. It's the best."

"Sure. If you don't mind being called Morticia."

"Morticia Addams was a babe. And super happy."

"So you're saying you aspire to be a member of the Addams family?"

"... I'm not saying I DON'T aspire to that ..."

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