1. The spray nozzle that is attached to my kitchen sink? For the past two years I thought it was brown. Which was weird, because nothing else in that kitchen is brown, but ... it was brown.
Yeah. I soaked it in vinegar this week?
Which, awesome. But also? YUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKKK.
2. Actual conversation:
"I don't know why I never thought of putting you and X together! It's GENIUS!"
"Um, because I find him intimidating? He scares me? I go out of my way to avoid him because he's so intense?"
"Although, that probably does mean I should marry him."
3. Another actual conversation:
"You know your cat is, like, the center of your entire life."
"You say that like it's a problem."
"You don't think it's a problem?"
4. I keep getting letters in the mail from various auto dealerships about my car. I've owned cars before and never had this happen -- for some strange reason, no one was particularly interested in getting their hands on my Dodge Colts (plural, because I owned two in succession), Dodge Neon, or Chevy Cavalier, but the people want the Wascally Wabbit for their very own. Good luck, suckers. The 2008 VW Rabbit is mine until the doors fall off. (A friend assures me that this can't actually happen, but this is someone who's never actually witnessed my driving.)
5. It's fall. I suppose this means that soon I will have to start wearing shoes.